• Mediation provides a safe space for you and your ex to have a conversation, negotiate and find resolution to conflict.

• You and your ex-partner are both seen as experts on your own life - you are seen and heard equally in the process.

• You make the decisions about your own life and circumstances whether these are child arrangements or financial agreements.

• Mediation is successful in over 70% of cases in helping ex partners separate out of court. (FMC)

• Mediation is confidential.

• Mediation puts the children’s well being in the forefront and allows parents to find ways to co-parent better even while separate.

• Mediation is a quicker, and a much less stressful process than going to court.

• Mediation is a much more cost effective way to divorce than going to court.

Family Mediation is a process which allowed ex-partners or family members to resolve issues around their separation or divorce. Such issues usually include children's arrangments and finanacial agreements, but they can include any other dispute. Family Mediation replaces going to court, and is in fact a precurser to going to court, because courts prefers issues of separation to be dealt by the ex-partners themselves.

Family Mediation creates a safe space for ex-partners to have a conversation and make their own decisions about their families and finances. Family mediators are impartial and neutral and are there to hold this space, make sure each party gets time to speak and is heard equally. They also help parties create the agenda and make sure that the conversation remains on topic.

Unlike couple's therapy which often revolves around the root of the relationship breakdown, Family Mediation helps people look ahead and plan their future amicably.

Natioanlly, Family Mediation helps more than 70% of couples reach an agreement. Success is of course reliant on the complexity of the issues, the circumstance, and the parties committment to the process.

This varies depending on the issues presenting, complexity of the case, and the parties' willingness and approach to mediation.

Typically mediation can take on average 2-5 joint meetings to reach an agreement. (Not including the MIAMs)

A MIAM is an initial meeting where each of the parties meets the mediator on their own. It stands for Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting.

In a MIAM:

• You will get to hear more about the principles and the process of mediation.

• You will get to share information about the situation you are in, and to tell your side of the story.

• You will have the opportunity to ask any questions. You will assess whether you feel that mediation will be suitable for you and your family.

• The mediator too, will be able to assess whether mediation is the right process for you.

Having a solicitor for legal advice during mediation is a good idea if possible.

Checking the agreements you reach in mediation with a solicitor can be reassuring.

Additionally, solicitors can help with ratifying any agreements you reach in mediation and making them legally binding.

Usually, family courts stipulate that it is a legal requirement to consider family mediation before applying to court. This is enforced through the requirement of the person who is making an application to court, to prove that they have attended at least a MIAM. (Through a form signed by the mediator.)

There are some exemptions to the requirements to attend a MIAM and they are in cases with:

• any form of domestic abuse

• child abduction

• child abuse

• drugs, alcohol or substance abuse

• other safety or welfare concerns

Both you, your ex partner, or your mediator can decide that medaition isn't suitable for your situation.

Mediation is always confidential which is a core principle of the process. During a MIAM you can share anything you wish with the mediator knowing that nothing will be disclosed to the other party. Similarly they will also be guaranteed confidentiality in their own MIAM.

When you both meet jointly, again confidentiality is guaranteed by the mediator and additionaly we ask that both parties commit to it as well. This is in order to keep all conversations between you confidential and "without prejudice" which means you can explore ideas and solutions freely knowing that nothing will be held against you later on, should the mediation process collapse and you will end up going to court. The aim here is to create a safe environment to negotiate freely and creatively to find the best solutions for you and your family.

While parties are bound by confidentiality, they are allowed and encouraged to seek legal advice from a solicitor with whom they can share the details of their agreements.

Two rare exceptions to the confidentiality principle are where there is a safeguarding concern for a child or one of the parties, or a money laundering offence (Proceeds of Crime Act 2002).

Yes. Mediation is underpinned by the wellbeing of children and therefore it is now encouraged to involve the children in mediation where both parents agree, and the children are interested. As it is for grown ups, medation is also voluntary for children, and they will never be made to take part if they are not comfortable. Similarly, children are offered the same confidentiality as their parents. With children's permission, the mediator can relay their feedback to the parents.

The recommended age is from 10 years of age, but younger children are often included if they want to, and their parents agree.

Children are always seen by mediators who have been specifically trained and accredited to speak with them.

Child Inculsive Mediation (CIM) has been shown to boost children's sense of self, and empower them to feel included in what would be a life changing process for them. While they don't get to decide anything, they often convey their point of view very clearly to a third party, which can be hard to convey to one of their parents when they are in dispute.

CIM is very impactful in helping parents make the right choices for their children, and enable them to focus on their shared interest - their children - and shift the focus away from the hurt and anger often so present in separation.

Those making an application to court for divorce must attend a MIAM at least. This means that they must consider using mediation to finalise their divorce or separation. (There are some exemptions to this, such as cases of domestic abuse, or cases where there is a child protection concern)

If mediation is then not the chosen route by either the applicant or the mediator, or indeed the other party declines to attend a MIAM and go through the process, the mediator will then issue the necessary court form for England and Wales to indicate that they have attended and that mediation wasn't the chosen route.

After attending a MIAM applicants can still apply to court on children's arrangements (form C100), or for financial remedy (Form A) which the mediator can sign to prove attendance at a MIAM. They can choose to do so even while going through mediation with the hope of reaching an agreement between them, and outside of court, which will ensure that any decisions remain in their control.

Additionally in the process of mediation both parties will provide a financial disclosure form which is the only part of mediation which then can be used in court should the mediation process collapse with no resolution.

Finally, while mediation agreements are not legally binding, they can be formalised by lawyers, and ratified in a court.

Yes, mediators* can sign court forms required by family court to prove that an applicant has attended a MIAM.

* Accredited co-mediators (when co-mediating) or PPC (supervisor) sign on behalf of those working towards accreditation.